The First of MANY Tests In Married Life

Okay, so I got married later in life(at 30) and stayed home until I did so.  I was never a mooch nor a sponge.  I gave my parents help(financially) whenever asked.  That being said, onto the first of what ends up being very many tests in my married life.  It was just 3 months after the wedding when I got those two beautiful lines....I was pregnant!!  I didn't realize how naive I was in the whole conception(biology) scheme of things.  We immediately made phones calls.  We were ecstatic.  I went for the blood work which confirmed that I was indeed pregnant.  For almost a week, we were on cloud nine.  Then, I started having pain.  Fairly new the the computer world, I looked up and realized it could be pregnancy related or it could be......worse.  It was the latter.  The look on my husband's face(of what I assumed was a massive disappointment in me) shattered me.  He had left for work and I simply waited.  I tried to hold out hope, but had started what looked like a period but felt so much worse(pain wise).  My sister and her husband came to take me to the ER, where my husband met me and an examination confirmed what I had already suspected.....I suffered a miscarriage.  I still didn't equate, in my head, that cells were just beginning to divide and an embryo forming.  In my mind, I lost a baby.  A day later, the doctor's office called to check on me and I cried to the nurse what happened.  She had mentioned the term 'chemical pregnancy' which I just did not compute.  Hearing how hysterical crying I was, the doctor got on the phone and explained that there was no actual baby, it was just in the beginning stages of development etc.  Like I said, at the age I was, I just didn't realize the whole concept.  I made myself well schooled in the science of 'reproduction', almost too much.  Instead of just 'trying' for subsequent babies, it became a series of timing, ovulation drugs and hope.  At one point, yes, it became 'work' and not so much 'fun', but my husband and I got creative in our journey towards parenthood.  That's what true love is....getting creative in your process rather than giving up. 

Bath Bomb Break!!!

 Bath Bombs

1/2 cup of Epsom Salts
30 drops of essential oils(Get them HERE)
4 oz Citric Acid
8 oz of baking soda
4 oz cornstarch
2 Tbsps liquid oil of choice
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 Tsps witch hazel

INSTRUCTIONS:

Mix dry ingredients in a large bowl until well combined.
In a separate smaller bowl, nix together the liquid ingredients until combined.
 Add liquid ingredients to dry and mix with hands.  Do wear gloves if you have sensitive skin.
 You'll know when mixture is ready if it holds together when squeezed.  If not, lightly spritz more water until it does, but not too much more water.

Quickly press mixture in silicone mold(I prefer silicone as they are easier to get out once hardened).

Store in air-tight container.

Use 1 or 2 in hot bath.

Recipe loosely based on Wellness Mama(my hero)

Another wedding???!!!

The year 2000 was the year of the weddings on our family.  My sister and his brother and one of his sisters.  Literally, when they heard of our engagement, is was like 'another wedding!!??'  We figured we'd give them a break and planned it for 2001.  Everyone was like, but that's an odd numbered year...bad luck...we were like no biggie, we're up for the challenge.  Not to mention the date we chose ended up being during Lent, which I guess in the olden days, it was a no-no to get married during that time, but I digress.  It was all it was meant to be...the calls, the orders, the payments....THE STRESS.  The best was when I went for my wedding dress.  It was me, my mom and her mom(my grandma Rose).  I tried on and tried on, each meeting with a courteous smile.  I was at a point where I wanted to stop, because trying on 50 pound dresses was so-o-o-o much fun and then it happened.  I told the girl assisting me this was the last one, I was tired, on my period and just wanted to bury my face in a vat of chocolate.  I came out and the girl put me in front of the mirror.  I had stopped trying to get my mom and grandma's attention.  I thought, hmm this has potential.  I turned around and there they were, mouths agape and my mom teary eyed.  That solidified it....I said yes to that dress!!

Party hangover ;)

So I get a call from the gentleman I met at the holiday party.  I was pleasantly surprised.  We chatted up a bit and then he asked me out.  I forget how long afterwards, but our first date was far from romantic.  We went over to his house, chatted some more over wine(or beer, can't recall).  He 'cooked' a frozen pizza in his convection/microwave(terrible idea).  But he did it and was so adorably shy at wanting to be a gentleman, it turned out to be the best date ever(I really mean that).  He was there, no filter, no machismo, just him and how he was and at that moment, I knew.  At the time, I wasn't really sure 'if' I knew, but I had a gut feeling.  Then after one week(or was it 2), he told me he loved me.  It wasn't the hearts and flowers TV/movie love, but real, salt of the earth, I'll always be here for you love.  Without hesitation, I blurted out that I loved him too.We got to know one another over the coming months.  There were ups and downs, but we recovered and persevered.  It was right.  One evening after work, I was waiting for him at his house.  Not feeling particularly well, I was sitting on the couch after he had gotten home.  He brought in this jelly bean filled glass(as it was almost Easter) stating that there was chocolate in it too(he knew I was a chocoholic).  I passed it up, not opening it for at least an hour.  We started watching a movie and again he mentioned about the chocolate.  I started to feel bad that I didn't open his thoughtful gift, so I tugged at the ribbon and was fishing around for a jellybean I liked. He stated again, about the chocolate and that maybe it was as the bottom and to dump it out on the coffee table.  So I did.........but there was no chocolate, only a dark red velvet box and I, for the first time, was speechless.  I opened it and there was a very genuine, simple and elegant ring.  At first he stood there with his hands in his pockets and matter of factly stated 'well, will you marry me?'  Of course I said yes and then he got down on one knee, placed the ring on my finger.  It had only been 4 months since we met, but I knew...that first night I met him I knew, ya know?!

Awe Ma, Do I have To Go??

It was an after the Holidays holiday party where my mom worked.  I was still living at home and was in a dating slump, if you will, and sulking.  Unbeknownst to me, my mother asked her boss if she could bring an additional guest(me).  That afternoon of the shindig, she tells me to get off my ass and start getting ready.  I was like "for what"?  She said you're going to the holiday party with your father and I, end of story.  My mom was never one you'd want to piss off, tiny physically disabled(though she never played that card, ever) Polish woman.  She broke a wooden spoon on my sister's butt once.....ONCE!!  I huffed off, grumbled all the while getting ready.  I don't even remember what I wore, a dress I think.  Threw myself together and off we went.  I have to admit it, once we got there and I relaxed, it wasn't too bad.  I knew most of the people my mom worked with so it wasn't like I was among strangers.  After dinner, when the dancing began, a young gentleman came over to talk to her.  He sort of looked familiar, but I just couldn't pinpoint where I knew him from.  They chatted a while and then he came over to me.  I was like, what the hell?? Was my mom playing matchmaker or something?  I looked over to her and she just winked.  I rolled my eyes and turned back to this young gentleman.  He introduced himself and then it hit me as to where I knew him from.  He was the son of a very well-known milkman in the area where we lived and had even delivered milk to our house.  We chatted for what seemed hours, had a few drinks...he even came to dance with my mom and I.  His awkwardness was incredibly sincere and adorable.  As the evening was coming to a close, a coworker of my mom's motioned(to me) to give him my number.  I didn't have a pen, so she handed me a brand new tube of lipstick.  It wrote incredibly clear on the square paper napkin.  I gave it to him and said to call me.  He walked me to our car(I drove with my parents), my mom and dad walking slowly behind us.  He told me 'thank you' and gave me the biggest hug I have ever received and he got into his truck and drove away.  Getting into our car, my mother had the biggest, shit-eating grin on her face.  I'm guessing, she thought "mission accomplished".  Little did I know...............